Hi friends! In this blog, I’m going to talk about a revelation that hit me like a lightning bolt, straight out of a shower thought, believe it or not. My hair was dripping wet, and there I was, supposed to be basking in the dreamy process of envisioning my magical 2024. Now stay with me, it’s a doozy, but it’s going to weave into our discussion on owning your focus—a concept so fundamental yet so elusive for many of us as we sail into the new year.

So here’s how the whole shower saga unfolded. I was doing my usual morning routine, dabbling in an online class, when I hit a snag with my login. “Fine,” I thought, “I’ll sort it out after my shower,” planning to multitask by doing some mental exercises. You know, those dream-life visualizations we all promise ourselves we’ll do more of. I was all set to wash my hair and simultaneously craft a future so bright, I’d need shades in the shower. But instead, I found myself spiraling down a rabbit hole of distractions, ending up on a train of thought about all the ways I couldn’t save my brother—a deep, personal pain of mine.

I think it’s essential to share this because distractions, they’re sneaky little devils, aren’t they? They creep up on us, no matter how honed our focus might be. And before we know it, we’re miles away from where our attention should be, ensnared in the clutches of regret, disappointment, or worry. This particular detour was not what I had planned. It was far from the dream life planning session I had envisioned. Instead, it became a stark reminder of the power of focus and the dangers of letting distractions take the wheel.

Here’s where it gets interesting. I decided to take control, to own my focus, and not let this spiral of negativity drown out my creativity or my plans for the future. I reached for what I call my “powerful jolt” – a method to snap myself out of these spirals. For me, it’s prayer first and foremost, talking to Jesus like he’s right there beside me (which, in a way, he always is). But sometimes, I need something more, something to kick-start that process and reclaim my thoughts.

That morning, my jolt was quite literal. I had to kick the negativity out of my shower, out of my head, telling it to beat it in no uncertain terms. It sounds a bit out there, but it worked. Laughing off the absurdity of the situation, I found myself energized, ready to tackle my original mission: focusing on creating that dream life for 2024.

Prayer followed, deep and expectant, and then came the action. Not just any action, but creative action, which is, in my opinion, the best kind. It’s where the magic happens, where plans begin to take shape and dreams start to feel attainable. This is the moment where everything shifts, from being stuck in a loop of “what if” and regret to moving forward with purpose and excitement.

Now, I want you to understand that owning your focus is not just about avoiding distractions; it’s about knowing how to pull yourself back when you inevitably wander off path. It’s about having a toolkit at your disposal, one that works uniquely for you, to help you redirect your energy towards what truly matters. For me, it’s a combination of prayer, powerful jolts, and creative action. But the beauty of focus is that it’s deeply personal. What works for me might not work for you, and that’s okay.

The key is to experiment, to find your own powerful jolt, your method of reconnecting with your goals and aspirations. Maybe it’s meditation, maybe it’s exercise, or perhaps it’s something as simple as saying out loud, “Nope, not today, distractions.”

As we edge closer to the end of the year, I challenge you to think about what owning your focus means to you. What are the distractions holding you back? How can you combat them? And, most importantly, how will you ensure that your focus is laser-sharp as we enter 2024?

Owning your focus is about more than just productivity hacks or time management tips. It’s about creating a really magical existence for yourself, one where you’re in control of your thoughts, your actions, and your future. It’s about not letting the negatives of today overshadow the potential of tomorrow.

So, I urge you, find your focus, own it, and let it propel you towards the life you dream of. And remember, it’s okay to stumble, to get distracted, or to have off days. What matters is how you bounce back, how you reclaim your power and refocus on what’s truly important.

Transcript: 

Miranda:
Hello. Hello. And welcome to another episode of the Own Your Awesome podcast. I’m your host, Miranda Von Frickin. Today, I’m super pumped to bring to you a thought, a concept, an awareness that’s not new And it’s not mind blowing, but it’s super important to the foundation of our success as we enter the new year. This episode, as you may have noticed, is called Own Your Focus. And this is something that came to me in a shower. Literally, my hair is soaking wet, And I just got out of the shower, and I was supposed to be in there dreaming, and here’s how it all started.

Miranda:
So I I did my morning routine. I started taking, one of the lessons in a class that I’m taking online, And I wanted to pause there because I had to reset my login for some reason. So I was like, alright. You know what? I’ll wait for the email. I’ll go take a shower, and I’ll do the homework that I didn’t actually complete from last week in the shower because it’s really just a mental exercise. So as I’m in the shower, I’m supposed to be thinking, in of my dream life. I’m supposed to be creating what I would love for my life in every area. Right? So this is me thinking, oh, I was gonna wash my hair.

Miranda:
I’m gonna be dreaming. I get the best Ideas in the shower, I’m gonna create a really magical existence for 2024, and what happened Came out of nowhere and happens to me often. And it’s something that I work with my clients on a lot. It’s Getting distracted. Right? I I did a full episode on distractions. It was called, squirrel. I don’t remember the number, but but scroll back a couple weeks and you’ll see what I’m talking about. Check that episode out, what it’s all about distractions.

Miranda:
So, obviously, it happens. No matter how much we practice focus and not being distracted, it still happens. My mind just Sometimes just kinda goes crazy. So unfortunately for me, this was not a magical dream vision casting type experience for me. I started spiraling about all the ways I didn’t save my brother. I know. It’s, it was not the best Moment for me to say the least. Was it self sabotage? Perhaps.

Miranda:
Was there anything I could have done to Help my brother live a longer life? I don’t think so. It was COVID. It was a whole thing. We can talk about that separately if you ever want some of the details, but I don’t think there was anything in my logical brain that I could have done. But my heart, of course, Still spirals and gets stuck in a place of regret and disappointment and anger and All the things, of course, that the big sister should have done to save her little brother. So I can’t change that. Obviously, after a lot of crying, A lot of yelling. I’m gonna tell you how I got refocused.

Miranda:
It it it became A powerful tool for me to currently and in the future get out of downward spirals that our minds sometimes takes us to. So, of course, it’s easier said than done. I spiraled into a topic or an experience in my life that obviously is Trauma inducing, and it’s gonna last for the rest of my life. And it’s something that if I’m able to To get out of it within 10, 15 minutes, there’s no reason you can’t use it. I’m about to share with you To get out of negative thinking when it comes to what’s happening in your world. Crappy work, toxic environment, shitty friends, Craptastic spouse, boyfriend, kids are stressing you out, you’re running out of time, your business is flailing, whatever it may be. You can get out of it by focusing forward. And here’s how I did that to Get myself in the right frame of mind as to why I didn’t lose an entire day spiraling into the negative abyss of what could have been.

Miranda:
So I focused forward. This is how I owned my awesomeness. Obviously, of course, I didn’t wanna stay stuck. So for me, it’s always prayer. Right? Just 1st and foremost, there’s no surprise. If you follow me at all, You know that prayer is always my 1st go to. I talk to Jesus like he’s my sidekick, and he’s sitting right next to me like my dog is. So what I need to do sometimes before I get into prayer is I need to jolt myself in a powerful way that’s aligned with what’s happening and acts as a bridge of getting me out of it.

Miranda:
So I call this my powerful jolt. Right? Some type of shocking statement That helps me to reclaim my thoughts. And what I did this morning, I had to rebuke the devil. I had to kick him out of the shower because there’s no way in hell you enter a shower Thinking I’m gonna create my dream life, and this is the place where I am the most creative and, you know, we all get our ideas in the shower. There is no way A negative spiral takes hold of you when you’re preparing to be your most fabulous creative awesomeness, and it’s not the devil. Like, it’s a 100%. That’s how it is. That’s how he rolls.

Miranda:
He knew I was about to create a magical plan to change the world in 2024. He wasn’t having So I had to rebuke his ass. So without getting into all the details of what I said to this person or this entity to get out of my shower and out of my mind. I rebuked him. I pretty much said, get the f out. You do not own me. You do not own my thoughts. I have the power of God with me.

Miranda:
The Holy Spirit will not let you take hold. Beat it, motherfucker. You can only imagine what that scene looked like. You’re welcome for the visual. So I had a strong powerful statement that shocked me out of it. Of course, it made me laugh a little bit, but Something in me got fired up. So whether it’s rebuking the devil, whatever it is for you, you need a strong, powerful, It’s you don’t even have to, like, create something that you say. Like, it would be cool if you had something on hand ready to just break out of your pocket and be like, boom.

Miranda:
Here’s my statement. But if that if that’s not something you typically do or feel comfortable doing or you’re just you didn’t do it yet and something crazy happens, Think of Jolt. You need a powerful lightning bolt joke statement, command to change your thoughts Instantly, back in the day when I used to have these really weird thoughts at night, I would just yell stop. Right? So, you know, stop. Get out of my head as if you’re talking to somebody else because we know these negative thoughts aren’t really us. It’s our fear. It’s our insecurity. It’s All the crappy parts of us that we’re trying to transform into beautiful magical parts, but they still linger because it is a part of us and it makes us human, but we do have more power over it than we think.

Miranda:
So for me, it was creating a strong, powerful jolt within my Within my own body, within my own mind, heart, and soul that made and acted as a bridge to get me from where I was to where I needed to go. And then after that powerful get out statement, it led me to prayer. Right? So for me, like, you would think I’d start with Prayer and and then it would lead me to some, you know, magical get out of my head statement, but I had to shock myself out of it because the prayer wouldn’t have been as effective. And I know you’re thinking like, wait a minute. Prayers have level of affectancy? Like, yep. They sure do. Because Making prayers happen, making God realize that this is what I actually want and not just some fluff thing that I’m saying in the moment, I have to come with conviction. I have to expect that this prayer is gonna be heard and answered in order for it to really sink in that that’s what I need.

Miranda:
Not just for God, but for me too. Right? For me too, we sometimes answer our own prayers. I’m a firm believer in that. And whether God helps us or leads the way or he just sits Back and lets us do us because he knows we got it. Either way, we have to speak and pray with conviction and know and expect that these things are gonna happen for us. So pray to God with expectant like prayers about what needed to happen or something better. Because, you know, my prayers are so small. I mean, let’s be honest.

Miranda:
We can’t even comprehend The abilities that guy has to change our lives and what he’s dreaming of us is so much bigger than what we’re dreaming for us. So In this moment, after rebuking the devil out of my shower, I had to take back focus. So my expectant prayer was, God, he’s gone. Thank you so much for helping me do that. I need you and the Holy Spirit to really fill my soul with positive thoughts of moving forward. I need to focus forward. I know you’ve got Vinny. I know you’ve got him.

Miranda:
I know you got him, and he’s okay. I don’t have evidence, but I know it. So what I need to do from this point forward is Take this energy that I have because energy could be used for good or bad. Energy is neutral. Hopefully, there’s no scientists listening to me and telling me that it’s not true. But energy is neutral, and whether we use it for good or evil, that that’s up to us. So I said I need to take all this energy and turn it into my original plan, which was building my dream life. What ended up happening, it’s always different from what I expect and what I want.

Miranda:
But the fact that I was so focused on moving forward and not having those negative thoughts, A different thought popped into my mind, and it it just kinda spiraled from there, but it was all a good spiral. So it wasn’t No longer that negative spiral I went down to, it spiraled into if my lot in life is to rebuke the devil from my world so I’m able to do the work that I do and help elevate the lives of women that I’m supposed to touch and elevate, then that’s what I’ll do. I will rebuke this jerky from my world every single hour of every single day if I have to if it keeps me on mission. Now the only reason I know that is because I’ve done a lot of work in self awareness, in my calling, who I’m meant to be. Like, that it I found it. I know what it is. I’m now living it out, and I help others to do the same. So if I’m gonna really help others do the same, I I have the devil on my shoulder giving me thoughts of negativity, things I can’t change, things that hurt my heart and soul and take me out of my focus? So I had to get rid of him, and I’ll I’ll do it every day if I have to.

Miranda:
So it was a powerful joke, a deep prayer conviction, and oddly enough, God answered the prayer right away and put some other thoughts in my head for podcast episodes. So, of course, this was one of them, Own Your Focus. The next one is Christmas. So we’ll do a holiday one. We’re gonna praise Jesus. We’re gonna love on him. It’s his birthday. And then the one after that is own your timing because I went down another thought process of how you know, I’m a little late to the game sometimes, but I’m always on time for me and what I’m meant to do.

Miranda:
So that’s just a tease for the next week’s 2 episodes. But though these 3 episodes came to my mind After that powerful jolt and expectant prayer, those are 2 really powerful things. And if you’re not a prayer, Feel free to just speak to the universe, to your angels, to your guides, whoever it is that you pray to, that you talk to even if it’s your highest self. Right? Like, I’m a huge fan of speaking to our highest self. So wherever you go in your mind, where you start to unravel things that are happening and create solutions, You gotta go there. You gotta you gotta kick out the negative thoughts. There if it’s not the devil and it’s just a negative thought for you, that’s fine. Kick it out.

Miranda:
It’s not welcome. No. Thank you. Beat it. Use that powerful energy as a like, say that crap out loud. I don’t care if you’re at work. Go go in your car and scream it if you have to. Turn up the music really loud so nobody hears you screaming at your thoughts.

Miranda:
Get it out of your head. Come back to your place of focus and center. Talk to your highest self. Talk to God. Talk to the Holy Spirit, whoever you talk to. And then after those 2 things have happened, You’ll feel a little more balanced, and you’ll feel hopefully motivated and inspired and buzzing with positive energy to actually focus Forward, which is the next thing that I do. Step 3 is to act as if it’s already in the works. This is what I kinda call creative action, and that’s what happened that’s what’s actually happening right now.

Miranda:
I’m recording this podcast Moments after getting out of the shower, doing these 2 things, my hair is soaking wet. I do have clothes on because I know you’re wondering. So Taking creative action, acting as if that prayer is coming, that’s the expectancy part, bridging to the action part. I know God is going to heal my heart, hear my thoughts, and they’re gonna help me to focus forward. I’ve got the Holy Spirit in me, So I already know I’m all powerful, so I’m going to use that energy, that buzz, that power to move forward through action. I like to call it creative action because typically being creative is so much fun and it feels good, and it just keeps us alive for the whole day. I could have taken that energy and just gone to work. I’ve got a post for some clients, which I’m a little late for only a few minutes.

Miranda:
So I could have gone right to work and used that energy. I could have gone on LinkedIn and started engaging with awesome people. I’ve could’ve done 15 other things that I need to do today, but I didn’t. I got creative. So my creative juices, It’s my voice. It’s always been my gift. So I 100% said I’m gonna use my voice, whether I’m writing something. So content for next week, whether I’m gonna speak it in a podcast, whether I’m going to record a live.

Miranda:
I didn’t go live because my hair is still wet. So I decided to create this podcast because all of these ideas and the all this energy was flowing through me In order for me to focus forward, and that’s the whole point of this, we will get into downwards downward spirals all the time. It’s not seasonal. I mean, it’s some of it’s seasonal, but sometimes it’s just like situational and sometimes it’s daily. We all have different lives, But we can’t stay in the spiral. It serves no purpose whatsoever because what actually tends to happen Is will spiral, will thinking of things, we get negative, we feel shame, we get down on ourselves, and our energy And our frequency decreases and what we put out to that world is what we’re getting back. So be careful in the spirals. Do not get Stuck in them.

Miranda:
Use these 3 steps, or we’ll talk about some other ways in a second. My 3 steps were having a powerful jolt, A shocking statement to get me out of it where I owned my power, episode 6. If you wanna scroll back, I have a full episode called own your power. So this helped me to own my power, take it back. I went into deep prayer with conviction, and then I took creative action acting as if The the expectancy side of that prayer was already coming. It was going to happen, and it did. So I’m super, super grateful that these 3 things worked for me, and I would love it if they worked for you, but that’s okay. Owning our focus is a very personal decision and action.

Miranda:
It’s up to us to decide if we wanna focus on moving forward and creating a plan that will work for you. Notice I said decision. You have to decide. That wasn’t even a step, but I know that I’m not staying in that spiral. I know it serves zero purpose. It doesn’t connect me to my brother. It doesn’t make me feel closer to him. It makes me feel pain, and I don’t wanna feel that.

Miranda:
And I get The the grieving process pain is a part of it, and it never goes away. So please side note, don’t think that I don’t grieve, that I don’t feel pain, And I don’t cry all the time. I do. I have it, and sometimes I allow myself to just feel it, to love on my brother, feel the loss, but you have to get out of it. You cannot stay in the negative thought because it it just spirals into a place that changes your life and it’s don’t serve nobody. It doesn’t help anybody. We’re all on this earth for a mission. We have a calling.

Miranda:
We need to live it out. If you know what it is, it’s this spiral is stopping you from living it out. If you don’t know what it is, it’s actually hurting your chances of finding it. So we need to get out of the spiral. So make the decision to not stay in the spiral right now no matter where you are, in your car, in your office, going for a walk. I don’t care where you are. Make the decision to never stay in a spiral, and then maybe brainstorm some ways that when you do get to it because it’s completely normal and it happens, How you’re gonna get out of it and focus forward. So it’s different for everyone.

Miranda:
I I gave you my examples of how I got out of that spiral, how I Focused my energy forward. Clients I work with range from extreme carelessness to extreme focus. So I’ve worked with women Throughout that full range of focus, for whatever reason they’re taking out of their focus, I’ve helped almost every type of person. But The one thing that they and you and I all need is the willingness to try, to be Open to new things, to new strategies, enlisting in in a help if you need, a therapist, a coach, A friend, a family member, let me warn you about that friend and family member. Make sure that the right friend and family member, not just any friend and family member. It may not be the person in your home. It may not be who you call your best friend. It may be someone different.

Miranda:
Say to yourself, Who can I enlist to help me get out of this and to focus forward that will be for me who’s kind of an unbiased participant and that can help me be accountable to actually focusing forward and moving forward? So just a caveat to help you having friends and family help you. Some of these things that that we can do some other ways, of course, would be self awareness ex exercises. I I use them often for myself And for the people I work with, some mindfulness practices to be mindful of your energy, your thoughts, In your actions, sometimes just taking inventory of what’s happening in real time, being completely mindful. What’s how does my body feel? How are my thoughts lately? How how’s my emotional energy and strength and endurance lately? Taking inventory of what’s happening currently. Some replacement therapy. This is something that I’m sure, like, an actual therapist would do a little differently, but I find ways When I come up with a negative thought or something pops in my head, I quickly replace it with something else. So it’s almost like a trigger. When something negative comes in like, Oh, man.

Miranda:
I suck. I can’t do that. The word suck triggers me to say learning. Like, I don’t suck. I’m still learning. I’m still perfecting. Learning is a lifelong process, so I can click quickly remind myself that I don’t suck. I’m just Learning.

Miranda:
I’m still learning. I don’t suck at anything. I’m learning. And if if I had some I don’t wanna learn, that’s okay. We move on. We don’t need to learn that. Next. Right? So finding little ways to replace negative thoughts with something more realistic or something a little more positive.

Miranda:
I’m not telling you you can’t have a negative thought, but if it doesn’t serve your calling your mission. If it’s not helping you to focus forward on whatever task you’re doing, it’s it’s not serving you. You gotta get rid of it. So get rid of it, replace it. And then, of course, time travel. You knew I was gonna say something crazy. Time travel is an exercise that I do with all my clients. I’m not gonna get into the details, but it has to do a little bit with replacement therapy, a little bit with being mindful and self awareness.

Miranda:
All the 3 things I suggested, I I have a specific exercise how I use with my clients where we go back in time and we we make some changes. It’s one of my favorite exercises because I’m obsessed with time travel. That could be a whole episode, but I digress. So friends, as we near The end of 2023, can you can you even imagine? All I want for you is everything you want for yourself, and the way to get there is 100% to own your focus. You’re gonna hear strategies in business. You’re gonna hear life strategies. You’re gonna hear ways to up your LinkedIn and your resume to get new jobs, and those are all absolutely on point. Do all of that.

Miranda:
But first, you have to focus. And in order to own your focus, you’re gonna need Dot.dot. I’m not giving you the one answer. I gave you so many answers already. You have to find it for yourself. That’s the What’s the thing that you can do to help you focus forward? Is it some of the things I suggested? Sure. Is it some of the things I actually did? I love them. Go rebuke the devil.

Miranda:
Get them out of your house. Bring in the Holy Spirit. I’m here for it. You need you need to talk to somebody about that? Oh, the dogs are rebuking the devil. This is why you don’t record podcast with the dogs next to you. But 100% focus forward, own your focus. There’s many ways for you to do it. Only 1 will work for you.

Miranda:
I can’t wait to hear what it is. Shoot me a DM on LinkedIn or Instagram. And, of course, if you like this episode, give me a 5 star review and tell me how awesome it was. Thank you so much for listening to another episode of Own Your Awesome. I’m your host, Miranda Von Frickin. And until next week,